The Music Store 2

SCENE 1. INT MUSIC STORE. [1:00pm]

A MAN ENTERS THE STORE AND BEGINS TO LOOK AROUND. EVENTUALLY HE COMES TO THE COUNTER. THE STORE ASSISTANT APPEARS FROM BEHIND THE COUNTER. HE IS AN OLD MAN DRESSED AS A BEAR. MUSIC IS PLAYING IN THE BACKGROUND.

ASSISTANT:
Hello Madam, How can I help you?

MAN:
[LOOKING CONFUSED] Have you got any of the animals?

ASSISTANT:
Animals madam, I’m sorry but we don’t sell animals here, this is a music store, your best bet would be the pet shop on Rotherman Street.

MAN:
No…the group The Animals

ASSISTANT:
Yes they have a large group of animals…in the pet shop on Rotherman Street.

MAN:
Well have you got any Monkees then?
WE SEE THE ASSISTANT SMACKING A MONKEY

ASSISTANT:
Erm…That’ll be the pet shop again madam

MAN:
The eagles?

WE SEE THE ASSISTANT WITH A STUFFED EAGLE ON HIS ARM

ASSISTANT:
Pet shop…

MAN:
Black Crows?

WE SEE THE ASSISTANT WEARING A HAT WITH A STUFFED BLACK CROW ATTACHED

ASSISTANT:
Rotherman Street...

MAN:
Surely you must have The Cure?

WE SEE THE ASSISTANT HOLDING A SYRINGE AND WEARING A WHITE COAT

ASSISTANT:
The cure for what madam? Rabies?

MAN:
The cu…You must have heard Stray Cats?

ASSISTANT:
Every night madam, crying like babies on my rooftop.

WE HEAR A BABY CRYING, THE ASSISTANT LOOKS SHIFTY. MAN WALKS OUT OF STORE LOOKING ANGRY.

MAN:
[SHOUTING] You live in a mad world!

ASSISTANT:
Oh, we’ve got that madam.

MAD WORLD BY TEARS FOR FEARS IS PLAYED OVER THE MUSIC STORE SPEAKERS.